We both knew there were other Palomino restaurants in other cities, but we thought there were only a handful (it turns out they’re everywhere) and at least I had high expectations for this week’s lunch at the downtown Minneapolis location—expectations that were further raised by the slew of prominently displayed Best Of awards that the place has garnered in its near-decade in the city. The first indication that something might be amiss: virtually all the awards were from five-plus years ago.

That’s not the only out of date aspect. The décor and ambience of the dining room were probably high style in the early 90s. Wasn’t that the time when burgundy was the "in" color? It’s still the predominant hue in Palomino. You won’t find the low-hanging, oversized, elaborate art glass light fixtures in any catalog today either.

According to the main lunch menu, "Palomino serves regional American cuisine inspired by the simple and rustic dishes of Europe." Basically, it’s an Italian restaurant. Half the menu is pizzas, pastas, and strombolis. The rest is "small" and "big" salads and meat and seafood entrees. You’re also handed a list of lunch specials, and most of what we ordered came from there.

We considered splitting an appetizer, but there’s literally only one on the menu that can serve the purpose, the standard and unseasonal mozzarella and tomato salad. Instead, I started with a bibb lettuce salad that came with bleu cheese and candied pecans. The dressing was cherry syrup, and there was too much of it. The sweetness overwhelmed other flavors.

For my main selection I ordered another Italian standard, the linguini vongole off the special menu. Our entrees came to our table while we were still working on our starters, the waitress mumbling that "some people are in a hurry for lunch." The clams were slightly on the wrong, i.e., rubbery, side of being just right, but the white wine, garlic, and parsley sauce was flavorful and the linguini al dente. Certainly much better than B’s lasagna, which was eggy and overcooked except for crunchy diced onion pieces.

But even my meal ended on an off note, as we decided to try dessert. The options here include tiramisu, Grand Marnier crème brulee, and a cappuccino crema. We got the warm pear bread pudding, made with ciabatta bread and bourbon sauce, with a scoop of Sebastian Joe’s vanilla bean ice cream. The ice cream was the only good thing here, the rest a bland concoction.

Only a by-the-glass wine list is displayed for lunch; it contains eight each of red and white. I had a Tommasi Pinot Grigio; dry with a pineapple note.

‘Nuff said (since B has been accusing me of prolixity in my reviews).

It was the Palomino bar, more than anything, that brought the patrons to this establishment. The bar was famous for people watching and blind dates. I used to live a few blocks away in the early nineties and this bar was almost my local. Going out with friends would commence with a mandatory drink at the Palomino. Alas! Those days are long gone and I am older and possibly wiser. The restaurant is easily accessed from the skyway but if you’re driving then construction and other problems on Hennepin Avenue will make this a difficult trip. The décor once trendy is now faded. The colors vary from pink to a mauve burgundy; there is almost cubist modern art on the walls. The restaurant area is hemmed in by the bar on one end and a kitchen on the other, with plenty of traffic between the two. There are large (and odd) light fixtures on the ceilings which defy description.

I started with a glass of Pinot Noir and the Roma Tomato soup. The wine was excellent the soup was too thick, almost like tomato paste. A & I were still attempting to eat our first course when the main course (A Lasagna) was thrust under my nose with a "Some people are in a hurry" line. The Lasagna was an unmitigated disaster after the first bite; too mushy in places and too crisp in others. I only eat a few mouthfuls before throwing in the towel. We finished up with a shared dessert: Warm Pear Bread Pudding, swimming in a sauce purportedly bourbon, served with a scoop of ice cream, a terrible, bland offering; perhaps we should have had the Tiramisu. The daily specials are listed on a special menu; the standard menu claims to serve "regional American cuisine", however most things on the menu are Italian. The menu is divided into Pizza, Salads, Sandwiches, Pasta, Strombolis, Meat & Poultry and Seafood. The dishes are fairly standard, the brick oven is greatly touted and every section offers something grilled in it. A had his normal post prandial espresso and the final bill came to $45.00.

We decided to walk through the bar on our way out—more for A’s benefit than anything else—and it too was faded and living on past glory, reflected in the "best of" awards hung proudly on its walls; the latest one was dated 1995 and that sums it all up nicely.

B